Tag Archives: office romance

The Office Romance: Danger or Opportunity

Posted on by

Heart shaped box of chocolate truffles with red roses

Spring may not have sprung yet, but this is definitely the month when love and romance are in the headlines. Everything is coming up roses and chocolate–covered strawberries. Perhaps your thoughts are turning to an office romance. Maybe the co-worker in the next cubicle is beginning to look awfully attractive. Could be you’d like to strike up more than a casual friendship. If so, what should you do and how should you go about it?

There are definitely dangers and opportunities when you consider an office romance.

It is not unusual today for people to find their spouse or partner in the workplace. After all, most people spend more of their time at work than anywhere else. According to the American Management Association, almost one-half—49% to be exact—of office romances result in marriage or a significant long-term relationship. If you choose to make a romantic move, be smart and follow the rules.

Know the company policy. Some companies have strict policies against dating coworkers. Most organizations don’t want to intrude on their employees’ private lives, but the shadow of sexual harassment looms larger than ever given the “Me, Too” and “Time’s Up” movements. If ever there was any doubt, recent events have underscored the long-standing advice never to date someone who is your supervisor or someone who reports to you. If you are even thinking about it, you need to start looking for another job.

Set the ground rules early. Discuss how you plan to handle you relationship around the office, and what you will do if things don’t work out. That may sound harsh and unrealistic. It definitely requires a level of maturity and discipline that is often hard to come by. Don’t put your career on the line for the sake of an office fling that may not lead anywhere but the unemployment line.

Consider the effect on your job performance. Being in love can be distracting. If your focus at work is on the object of your affection and not on your job, you are putting your career at risk. On the other hand, job performance might just improve when you are trying to impress that other person.

Be discreet and professional. It is never a good idea to discuss your romantic relationships with coworkers so keep the details to yourself. People will talk. There is no subject more popular than office gossip. Rumors of your romance will spread faster than a forest fire.

Proceed slowly. Gradually develop your friendship. Keep your interaction casual in the beginning. If ever there was a time to be cautious, this is it. The stakes are high if an office romance is on the horizon.

Be especially careful if you are new on the job, whether you are the one who is pursuing or the one being pursued. As a new hire, you are under extra scrutiny. Your boss and co-workers will be watching you closely and observing how you conduct yourself on the job.

Be wary of email. Don’t use the office email to correspond with each other unless it is purely professional and business related. Remember that email is like the newspaper. Anyone can read it. Before you hit “send,” make doubly sure that what you are sending is all business, just in case it lands in the wrong inbox.

Steer clear of Facebook and other social media sites to post the details of your new-found love. That’s where people go first when they want to pry and spy. Posting selfies while you are out at the neighbor bar or announcing where the two of you are having dinner is a really bad idea. You won’t need to pay for a Facebook ad to boost your post.

Never ever ever get involved with someone who is married. When word gets out—and it will—that is the surest way to find yourself on the street without a job.

An office romance can be successful and lead to life-long happiness if handled correctly. The wise couple is careful that any interaction in the workplace is purely professional. It’s a matter of having your career and dating it, too.

Here’s to finding love in all the right places!

Lydia Ramsey is a Savannah-based business etiquette expert, professional speaker, trainer and author. Contact her at 912-604-0080 or visit her at LydiaRamsey.com to leave a comment, ask a question or learn more about her programs and products. More business etiquette information is available in her best-selling book Manners That Sell – Adding The Polish That Builds Profits.

 

 

 

 

 

Office Romance -Danger and Opportunity

Posted on by

box of chocolate truffles with red rosesIt’s not exactly spring yet when a young man’s (or young woman’s) fancy turns to love, but it is the month of romance. There is Valentine’s Day. And bonus! This is also Leap Year when traditionally a woman can propose to a man—a custom that goes back to the 5th century. Perhaps your fancy is turning to romance and an office romance to boot.

Is the girl or guy in the next cubicle beginning to look awfully attractive? Maybe you’d like to strike up more than the usual office friendship, If so, what should you do and how should you go about it?

It is not unusual for people in today’s workplace to find their spouse or partner in the workplace. According to the American Management Association, almost one-half—49% to be exact—of office romances result in marriage or a significant long-term relationship. After all, most people spend more time in the workplace than anywhere else. If you choose to make a romantic move, be smart and know the rules.

Know the company policy. Some companies have strict policies against dating coworkers; others don’t address it at all. Although most organizations don’t want to intrude on their employees’ private lives, the shadow of sexual harassment looms large. It is never wise to date someone who is your supervisor or someone who reports to you.

Set the ground rules early. Discuss how you plan to handle the relationship around the office, and what you will do if things don’t work out. That requires a level of maturity and discipline which  is often hard to come by, but do it if you both want to keep your job. Don’t put your career on the line for the sake of a romance that might not work out.

Consider the effect on your job performance. Being in love can be distracting. If your focus at work is on the object of your affection and not on your job, you are putting your career at risk. On the other hand, job performance could improve when you are trying to impress that other person.

Be discreet and professional. It is never a good idea to discuss your romantic relationships with coworkers so keep the details to yourself. People will talk. There is no subject more fascinating than office gossip.

A few extra words of caution about romance in the office:

Observe the one year rule of dating in the workplace. Gradually become close friends with a co-worker. Start by keeping your interaction casual. This is definitely not the time to go head over heels right off the bat.

Be especially cautious if you are new on the job, whether you are pursuing or being pursued. Because you are a new hire, you will be under extra scrutiny. Your boss and co-workers will be watching your closely and observing your professional behavior.

Be wary of email. Don’t use the office email to correspond with the object of your affection. Remember that email is like the newspaper. Anyone can read it. Before you hit “send,” make sure that what you are sending is purely professional.

Steer clear of Facebook and other social media sites to post the details of your new-found love. That’s where people go first when they want to pry and spy.

Never ever ever get involved with someone who is married. When word gets out—and it will—that is the surest way to lose your job.

Office romance can be fun and successful. Take the proper steps to ensure that the relationship will not interfere with your job and career. The wise couple is careful that any interaction in the office is purely professional. It’s a matter of having your career and dating it, too.

Here’s to finding love in all the right places!

Photo from Savannah magazine

Photo from Savannah magazine

Hire Lydia to work with your staff to improve customer service and employee relations through the use of those priceless and often over-looked soft skills called manners. Lydia is the “unstuffy” business etiquette expert who helps individuals and organizations add the polish that builds profits. We’re talking about your bottom line here.

Since 1996, countless people have benefited from her wisdom through keynotes, seminars and conference breakout sessions.  Her Southern charm and sense of humor have made her a sought-after speaker and consultant.

Based in Savannah, Georgia, Lydia is available for national, regional and local speaking and training engagements. She has suitcase; will travel.

Contact her via email at lydia@lydiaramsey.com or call 912-604-0080. Sign up for her free monthly newsletter and visit her website, lydiaramsey.com

Romance in the Office: Is It A Good Idea?

Posted on by

February is the month of romance signified by the celebration of Valentine’s Day—every florist’s dream day for sales. And wouldn’t you know?  Savannah, my home, has just been declared by USA today to be the second most romantic city in the USA. If your thoughts are turning to romance right about now, there’s good reason—in fact, maybe two good reasons, depending on where you live.

Is the girl or guy in the next cubicle beginning to look awfully attractive?  If so, what should you do? Before you make your first move, give it some thought. If you decide to pursue your interest, you may be jeopardizing your love life and your career.  On the other hand, if all goes well, your job performance may improve and your personal life stands to take a turn for the better.

It is not unusual for people in today’s workplace to find their spouse or partner in the office. According to the American Management Association, almost one-half—49% to be exact—of office romances result in marriage or a significant long-term relationship.  After all, most people spend more of their time in the workplace than anywhere else. If you choose to make a romantic move, be smart and know the rules.

Know the company policy.  Some companies have strict policies against dating coworkers; others just ignore it. Still others even encourage it. Although most organizations don’t want to intrude on their employees’ private lives, the shadow of sexual harassment looms large. And it is never wise to date someone who is your supervisor or who reports to you.

Set the ground rules.  Discuss early on how you plan to handle the relationship around the office, and what you will do if things don’t work out.  While that requires a level of maturity and discipline that is often hard to come by, do it if you both want to keep your job. Don’t put your career on the line for the sake of a romance that might not work out. Approach with caution.

Consider the effect on your job performance.  Being in love can be distracting.  If your focus at work is on the object of your affection and not on your job, you are putting your career at risk.  Don’t spend more time in the copy room or at the water cooler than you normally would. On the other hand, job performance could improve when you are trying to impress that other person.

Be discreet and professional.  It is never a good idea to discuss your romantic relationships with coworkers so keep the details to yourself.  People will talk. There is no subject more fascinating than the office gossip.

A few extra words of caution about romance in the office:

Observe the one year rule of dating in the workplace. Gradually become close friends with a co-worker. Start by keeping your interaction casual. This is definitely not the time to go head over heels right off the bat.

Be especially cautious if you are new on the job, whether you are pursuing or being pursued. Because you are a new hire, you will be under extra scrutiny. Your boss and co-workers will be watching your closely and observing your professional behavior.

Be wary of email. Remember that email is like the newspaper. Anyone can read it, and someone may. Before you hit “send” make sure that what you are sending is as professional as you want to appear.

Steer clear of Facebook and other social media sites to post the details of your new-found love. That’s where people go first when they want to pry and spy.

Office romances can be fun, and successful. Take the proper steps, however, to ensure that the relationship will last without interfering in the workplace. The wise couple is careful that any interaction in the office is purely professional.  It’s a matter of having your career and dating it, too.

Here’s to finding love in all the right places!

professional speaker

Photo from Savannah magazine

Hire Lydia to work with your staff to improve customer service and employee relations through the use of those priceless and often over-looked soft skills called manners. Lydia is the “unstuffy” business etiquette expert who helps individuals and organizations add the polish that builds profits. We’re talking about your bottom line here.

Since 1996, countless people have benefited from her wisdom through keynotes, seminars and conference breakout sessions.  Her Southern charm and sense of humor have made her a sought-after speaker and consultant.

Based in Savannah, Georgia, Lydia is available for national, regional and local speaking and training engagements. She has suitcase; will travel.

Contact her via email at lydia@lydiaramsey.com or call 912-604-0080. Sign up for her free monthly newsletter and visit her website, lydiaramsey.com.

Head Over Heels In The Office

Posted on by

As Valentine’s Day approaches, your thoughts might be turning to romance in the office. The girl or guy in the next cubicle is looking awfully attractive. In fact you may already be head over heels, but haven’t yet revealed your feelings. What should you do?

Head Over Heels In The OfficeIf you decide to pursue your interest, you may be jeopardizing your love life and your career. On the other hand, if all goes well, your job performance may improve and your personal life will take a turn for the better.

According to the American Management Association, almost one-half-49% to be exact- of office romances result in marriage or a significant long-term relationship. After all, most people spend more of their time in the workplace than anywhere else. So if you decide to make the romantic move, be smart and know the rules.

Know the company’s position. Some companies have policies against dating among coworkers; others just ignore it. Although most organizations don’t want to intrude on their employee’s private lives, the shadow of sexual harassment looms large. It is never wise to date someone who is your supervisor or who reports to you.

Set the ground rules in the beginning. Discuss early on how you plan to handle the relationship around the office, and what you will do if things don’t work out. While that requires a level of maturity and discipline that is often hard to come by, do it if you both want to keep your job.

Consider the effect on your job performance. Being in love can be distracting. If your focus at work is on the object of your affection and not on your job, you are putting your career at risk. On the other hand, job performance could improve if you are trying to impress that other person.

Be discreet and professional. It is never a good idea to discuss your romantic relationships with coworkers so keep the details of your dating to yourself. The wise couple is careful that any interaction in the office is purely professional. It’s a matter of having your career and dating it, too.

Don’t let the love of your life get away. Be wise and be discreet. Use your head; but don’t lose your head.

professional speaker

Photo from Savannah magazine

Hire Lydia to work with your staff to improve customer service and employee relations through the use of those priceless and often over-looked soft skills called manners. Lydia is the “unstuffy” business etiquette expert who helps individuals and organizations add the polish that builds profits. We’re talking about your bottom line here.

Since 1996, countless people have benefited from her wisdom through keynotes, seminars and conference breakout sessions.  Her Southern charm and sense of humor have made her a sought-after speaker and consultant.

Based in Savannah, Georgia, Lydia is available for national, regional and local speaking and training engagements. She has suitcase; will travel.

Contact her via email at lydia@lydiaramsey.com or call 912-604-0080. Sign up for her free monthly newsletter and visit her website, lydiaramsey.com.

Office Romance

Posted on by

Before you initiate a romance in the office with a coworker ask yourself these questions:

  1. What is the company policy?
  2. How will you handle the relationship when at the office?
  3. What happens if the relationship ends?
  4. How will this relationship affect your job performance?
  5. Are we able to be professional and discreet?

Depending upon the answers to these questions dating a coworker can rewarding or it can be a disaster.  Decide if you want to risk your career before you take that first step to a dating relationship with a coworker.

professional speaker

Photo from Savannah magazine

Hire Lydia to work with your staff to improve customer service and employee relations through the use of those priceless and often over-looked soft skills called manners. Lydia is the “unstuffy” business etiquette expert who helps individuals and organizations add the polish that builds profits. We’re talking about your bottom line here.

Since 1996, countless people have benefited from her wisdom through keynotes, seminars and conference breakout sessions.  Her Southern charm and sense of humor have made her a sought-after speaker and consultant.

Based in Savannah, Georgia, Lydia is available for national, regional and local speaking and training engagements. She has suitcase; will travel.

Contact her via email at lydia@lydiaramsey.com or call 912-604-0080. Sign up for her free monthly newsletter and visit her website, lydiaramsey.com.